The sweet, wonderful, and talented Mallory, captured our most favorite day ever.
I love this angel face!!!!
Adoption: Our Sweet Amanda's perspective
Olivia's birth mom, Amanda, was kind enough to share some of her feelings. We love Amanda and she will always be part of our family and my best friend.
Olivia's birth mom's perspective
Hello everyone, Danee and I have talked about this for a while and we decided that it was a good idea to share my side of our journey. And of course, it is my favorite story for obvious reasons . But the hardest part is figuring out where to start:
At the beginning of my pregnancy adoption had never crossed my mind. I loved this baby without a doubt. But as time went on things began to become more real, I began to feel more and more inadequate. I knew I would be a great mother without a doubt to this baby, but because of my beliefs, deep down I knew she deserved better than that. I felt hopeless and worthless. I said a prayer that I will never ever forget, asking for guidance, for not only myself, but most importantly for this sweet innocent baby. I promised Him that I would do whatever He asked of me. I didn't want to think about my feelings, wants, or desires. She deserves the world. Within minutes of saying this prayer, I received an email from my caseworker about a family hoping to adopt. I pulled up the email. A picture showed up. Right when I looked at the woman in the photo and as I made eye contact with this complete stranger, a very overwhelming feeling came over me and I KNEW, this was supposed to be her mom. I cried and cried and cried. These people were suppose to be her eternal parents. I felt complete peace. As hard as it was to look another woman in the eye and know she is the woman chosen to be the mother of your child, I just knew. And when I met them I knew exactly why. They are simply amazing. I needed them and they needed me. We clicked. No questions asked. And Our friendship grew stronger as the few weeks went on, as we waited for this miracle baby girl.
On July 4th, 2014, I called the Lowry's at 4 pm telling them my water had broke. And at 11:59, July 4th, I finally got to hear the sweetest cry there ever was. Olivia Lou had entered the world and was placed on my chest. Those moments are simply indescribable. I finally could comprehend what a perfect love was. She is everything I could have dreamed of and more. A perfect healthy beautiful baby girl. The Lowry's came that night and it was so special. But reality hadn't set in yet. I held her all night and all the next day. I was blessed to have my family there and a few visitors. As the time went on, I started to realize what I had to do and I was overcome with emotion. The Lowry's were so kind and respectful for allowing me to have this alone time with Olivia. I can never thank them enough. Sunday morning came, the day of discharge. I held her as tight as I could and prayed with her. This sweet angel was perfect and she looked exactly like me. How was I suppose to do this and not run the other way? Heavenly Father blessed me beyond measure when it was time for placement. Angels surrounded me when I placed Olivia in Danee's arms. We all cried together. I did what I knew was right, despite my pain, wants, and heart break. I can't describe the feelings that overcame me for the next few days. But I know I had a strength that wasn't my own. I have truly been blessed. Although I am fully aware of my mistakes, I feel honored that The Lord trusted me at a time when I felt worthless. I feel honored that Olivia has allowed me to be her birth mom and in her life. She has helped shape me into the person I have always wanted to be. The love I have for her is never ending. I was able to give her the life she deserves with Rob and Danee Lowry. They are incredible parents. We aren't best friends because we HAVE to be. We CHOOSE to be. God is Good. He loves us all and is fully aware of our needs. Open adoption is amazing. And how rewarding it is to see a family of two grow into a family of three. I love the Lowry crew!
With love, Amanda (Proudly Olivia's birth mom)
Adoption: Meeting our miracle Olivia Lou Lowry
Our hearts completely burst when our sweet daughter Olivia was born on July 4, 2014. We have been waiting and praying for her for years. She is the perfect addition to our family and brings the sweetest spirit into our home. Amanda, Olivia's birth mom (and our bff), made all of our dreams of becoming parents a reality. Here is how we met our angel miracle girl.
July 3, 2014 we headed to Disneyland to get one more visit out of our annual passes before Olivia was born. Amanda wasn't due for a week and a half and had no signs of labor so we thought it was a great idea to spend the fourth at the happiest place on earth. Thursday night we went to the park as soon as we got to Anaheim. We had a great time and rode some of our favorite major rides and had some yummy treats too! We stayed late at the park but figured it was worth it. Friday morning we got up early and got to the park ready for a fabulous fourth. A few days before Rob broke his toe pretty badly and all the walking at Disney made it worse. Throughout the day we went to the first aid area and iced his toe. We were in the medical area around 4:00 pm when I got a call from Amanda. She said she was pretty sure her water broke and she was headed to the hospital. Without thinking I just grab my stuff and started running towards the park exit. Poor Rob had to get his shoe on quickly and chase me down to figure out what was happening. If you are familiar with Disneyland you know what is going on around 4:00 pm.....THE PARADE! Here we are, literally running down Main Street, trying to get to the hospital in Phoenix where our daughter was about to be born. I remember the cast member holding the rope blocking the street where the parade is telling us we couldn't cross. Rob lets her know we have a bit of an emergency and she says "after Simba passes you can cross". This is where I start crying haha! I was so overwhelmed with emotion that I couldn't handle it. We finally got to the car and grabbed our stuff from my brother's house where we were staying and headed back to the desert. That was the longest most awkward car ride of my life. We didn't know what to feel or think. Everything we had been waiting for was about to happen. We couldn't believe it. We went home, grabbed our bags, and switched cars. Off we went to Phoenix. Again, longest drive ever! We didn't go straight to the hospital but went to our friend's house where we would spend the next few days. (Major thanks to our Epson's for making our home away from home for us. They even set up a nursery for us in their guest room. It literally was a huge blessing and we are so grateful for them.). Amanda had asked us to wait to come to the hospital until she called us. Her mom was keeping us updated on her progress and kept sending us pictures and video. We loved it! It was hard to be so close to where Olivia was being born but not be there. It was even harder once we knew she was born and just waiting to go meet her. We had no problem doing it though because we love Amanda and wanted her to be comfortable. Olivia was born at 11:59 pm, our firecracker barely made it on the fourth! Amanda had us come over around 1:00 am. and we met our baby girl for the first time. The love we immediately felt for our baby girl was amazing. I will never forget the spirit we felt in that moment. The love I felt for Olivia, I felt equally for Amanda. I will cherish her forever and she is forever part of our family. We spent time that weekend with Amanda, our baby girl, and getting to know some of Amanda's sweet family. Amanda also had a day where she had some alone time with Olivia. I would never want to take that time away from her. Heavenly Father knew Amanda would need this time and He also knew that it would be difficult for us to not see Amanda and Olivia. I was so taken by how The Lord takes care of us. This is where our sweet friends, The Epson's come in. We were able to spend this time with them laughing, talking, and staying busy to help with being away from our two miracle girls. It may seem like a little thing but I know it to be part of The Lord's plan. He is always looking out for us.
Sunday came and it was discharge day for Amanda and Olivia. The day our baby girl would be coming home with us! Exciting, right?! Well, not so much. I am forever grateful for Olivia and that we get to raise her and be her parents for eternity. This day was the hardest day of my life though. I sit here trying to write about it and my heart breaks again. Having to see someone we love so much in pain was the worst feeling ever. Amanda is the strongest person I know but placing your child in the arms of another can't be easy for anyone. Tears filled the room between the three of us. I was trying so hard to be strong for Amanda but I couldn't. Rob, Amanda, and I hugged and cried together before Amanda left with her mom. I sat there and bawled for a good fifteen minutes before I could get Livi in her seat to leave. In that moment I was overcome with the feeling that maybe the way I was feeling was a very small way Heavenly Father feels when He has to watch his children in pain. He knows we have to hurt sometimes for things that will benefit us. I know I can't compare my love to The Savior's love but I can imagine a little of what it feels like. I have so much love for Amanda and I always will. I don't want anyone to think I am not grateful for our angel Olivia, I am. That day was just an extremely hard day because of how much I love Amanda.
I'm hoping that Rob and Amanda can share their feelings on the blog at some point too.
Here are some pictures of our meeting.
My heart is full
Rob got to cut some of Livi's cord!
They left it extra long so he would have that opportunity, so sweet!
Our angel
Amanda's sweet Grandma